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Home Personal Development

INTRIGUING: Viewing self-harm from another angle

Tumihub Best ink by Tumihub Best ink
June 7, 2022
in Personal Development
3
INTRIGUING: Viewing self-harm from another angle

Women and suicide

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Let me start with this personal story

There is this lady who is always contacting me to report a friend of mine who has been taking her feelings – for him – for granted. He is not ready to be in relationship with her which is not a problem. Right?

But then, he will still not let her go – at least to give a chance for someone else.

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You probably may wonder why the lady is waiting. it is not as if he will tie her down or something.

She really loves him. She wants the relationship so badly. I will tell you why

This my friend is very tall and handsome and has a consistent flow of income. Smiles. Please don’t take this seriously; it is just on a lighter note.

Here is where I am going..

It got to a stage that she started to hurt herself. One day, she told me that

‘I am not feeling anything and i needed to’

I was confused. I didn’t understand what she meant by that but all she could say is that she has no feeling at the moment. Someone is hurting her but she is not reacting to it. It is just like somebody slapped you and you can’t feel it. She really wanted to feel it – the blackmail, heartbreak or whatsoever.

In a nutshell, she resolved to taking a blade (or any sharp object) to cut herself until blood start gushing out.

That was her way to get a feeling.

That is an example of self-harm

According to that Google, Self-Harm is direct intentional injury of one’s own skin tissues without a Suicidal Intention. Well, God no go shame us o. Wahala for who want to understand all of these big grammar.

Let me just make it succinct. Self-Harm is Killing yourself without dying.

Although by definition self-harm is non-suicidal, it may still be life threatening. While you are trying to look for blood, what if you cut out an important vein?

Statistics by therecoveryvillage.com cited that people who engaged in 20 or more self-harm behaviours are about 3.5times more likely to attempt suicide compared to those who have fewer self-injury actions. Whether fewer or more, it can as well leads to death.

While looking for more statics, I came about a story about 6 males and 7 females under 15 years of age who died due to intentional self-harm published by ohochr.org    

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Self-harm is usually as a result of inner problem. It can happen when you are feeling depressed, stressed or when you are dealing with mental health issues.

Most times self-harming brings temporary relief but it does not resolve the issues you may be facing. There are other ways to cope without self-harm as the answer. Sometimes you feel alone, or that no one understands you. It may come across as that nobody gets you but you need to realize that lots more people know what the condition really is like.

Listen to me

Like I said earlier, Self-Harm is you Killing yourself without dying.

Hey Missy, this love is one-sided. He doesn’t even treat you like you matter. Oh, you know that but you’re so hopeful that he will come to love you someday!! Killing yourself without dying!

Dear married woman, how long will you endure this domestic violence? You’re damaging your mental health and physical appearance too. You’re staying for your children, making sure they do not grow up in a broken home, at the expense of your life???? Killing yourself without dying.

Hi Worker-man, how long will you keep at that job that brings so many emotional assault and unfavourable work condition. But times are hard you say. The job market isn’t smiling at anyone and I have black tax to pay. Right? Killing yourself without dying

Dearest girl, how long will you bottle up those pains, bearing the burden alone, feeling like a failure, feeling insufficient till it escalates to depression. Sharing your pains makes you feel weak you say. Nobody actually cares. Oh, you think you will get over it – right? Killing yourself without dying.

And the list is Endless…

Someone you know, anyone (might even be you) is inflicting him/herself, with harm, dying… daily!

What I can’t seem to wrap my head around is the ‘Why?’

Why should you remain in that abusive relationship when you can be loved truly?

Why should you die in silence when you can speak up and be heard?

Why should you be violated when help is all around you?

Why should you harm yourself when you are made with love and for love?

But I got a remedy. Yes… SELF LOVE

Love yourself enough to know when to stop!

Love yourself enough to desire the best for you!

Love yourself enough to appreciate how far you’ve come and how far you’ve achieved!

Don’t do it… Don’t Harm your body, don’t Harm your emotions, don’t Harm your heart

You’re more, you’re made with love and for love!!!!

See you smiling…

Instead of harming yourself, what else can you do?

While you may feel confused, unsure and disoriented the first step to dealing with self-harm is to talk to someone about it. They say talking is like a soothing balm. Talking about it to people who you are very much close to like parents, close friends, mentors or even a mental health professional.     

Talking about it with a mental health professional is very bold step as self-harm can be a sign of underlying issues such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and others.

Because self-harm awareness day, I want you imbibe the believe in you that self-harming is not a permanent solution to whatever difficulty you are going through and that talking it out is key.

Need to talk to someone?

Feel free to connect with us any time on Tumihub to share anything with us. We don’t discriminate; we don’t judge or quickly jump to conclusion; we already love you just the way you are; we have several professionals to help; we will listen to you. Contact us on WhatsApp using the icon showing at the left-downward corner of your screen.

Don’t forget to always choose self-love instead of self-harm. 

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Comments 3

  1. kristanlightpen says:
    2 years ago

    Killing yourself without dying got my attention. Self-harm is far pain-inflicting than the external self. Self-Love is my Goal ooo. Loving myself like Kilode

    Reply
    • Michael says:
      2 years ago

      Loving yourself really worth it

      Reply
  2. Pingback: let's talk about insecurity. hear our story | Tumihub

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