Relationships can be fun-filled and long-lasting if some of the secret rules are followed. Well, before I go any further, the relationship we are talking about here can be in form of marriage, romance, living together partners, or any of similar kinds.
Also, let me make this clear that…
I agree strongly with the fact that a relationship is completely subjective and no clear-cut rules can be executed on it; yet following certain guidelines may help you experience the happy relationship you desire. If you want a happy relationship, then these secrets should be a part of you.
Many of these rules are based on the life experience of many happy couples and also the observation made by people.
What exactly do you want when you gave that relationship a chance?
When two people get into a relationship, many of them wish for a lasting one. Pathetically, a good number of them go apart after a while, in search of new partners.
I know someone whose love story is worth sharing because it is most likely the common scenario of every love story which is the same picture painted on different pages.
“Nothing can stop us from getting married. I love him and he loves me in return. Besides, I didn’t just love him, I love who he is becoming and I am so proud of him. So forget it! This is different from other relationships I have ever been in.”
Taiwo told me this on two different occasions. The first time was in 2013 when she fell in love with Ife. The second was in 2019 when she fell in love with Victor. She eventually broke up with both of them.
Guess what! In 2020, she told me this after deciding to stay off relationships.
“I don’t have the time of any guy right now. If any guy breaks up with me right now, I will move on. I am done with love in Tokyo”
There are so many Taiwos out there who have gone through similar experiences. But today, I want to tell you something different. I would like to share with you the secrets that constitute long-lasting relationships.
Secrets of a happy relationship
- Breakup and Divorce are not the Solution
When asked about the best possible way of resolving the issues in relationships or marriage, many people may say a breakup or a divorce is the best possible method of putting an end to all the troubles in a relationship. This is likely the biggest mistake that people make in a relationship.
The reason for the increased divorce rate was analyzed as the mentality of people who even before getting into a relationship think of divorce as means of solving possible issues in it.
A divorce is never an option but it’s the utmost decision to be taken in life only in an inevitable situation. Do not even think about a breakup or marriage whenever you confront minor issues in relationships. Issues are just byproducts of the happiness experienced in the relationships.
- There is no Perfect Relationships. We only have Perfect Situations
No one can be considered to be in a perfect relationship. How happy a spouse is in a relationship is directly proportional to the happiness of the situations created by the partners. No relationship, as a whole, is destined to be jovial and satisfying. There will be moments of happiness and moments of struggles.
The couple who learns the secrets of balancing both happiness and struggles wins in life and enjoys the best possible relationship.
When there are issues or tension, many people might think that they are fated to fall into the wrong relationship, and at the same time ignore the possible chances of making each moment in life happy by understanding the partner a bit more and adjusting a bit more.
- Don’t be afraid. Don’t also make your spouse Afraid
Another secret of a happy relationship lies in how open and frank you are with your partner. Do not feel afraid to say your mind to your partner and never ever make him/her afraid to do so too. When people communicate, many of the issues can be melted down. An issue, no matter how ignorable it is, when kept in mind for several days, can take forms of anger, frustration, dislike, and so on, and get expressed in the most undesirable manners. Let communication between partners be a frequent element and no one should be reserved when he/she needs to talk.
- Love is defined as Respect and Care
How can you say you love your partner but can never express the love as it is?
Love is not just about emotions, it comes with other packages which include, respect, care, communication, dedication, forgiveness, and so on. Express the emotions whenever possible to make the other person feel the intensity of your love. Do not be a miser in loving your partner. Let your love be unconditional. It is rightly said that love is defined as respect and care. When the partner feels that you do not care for him/her or do not give him/her due respect, the person may think of getting into a relationship with another person.
- Always Support Each Other
Never leave your partner unsupported. You can provide support by giving ideas, opinions whenever he/she needs it. Have it at the back of your mind that you are the only one he/she can lean on for support. When both of you are alone, you can argue with each other on points you have a different view on. But in public, both of you should have only one voice.
Holding hands especially when he/she is sad or broken, helps convey your care. Once you have decided to live together, then no questions of separation should arise – not even as a joke.